Christmas Sweater

Yesterday, I had two of my like seven family Christmases. It was fabulous. I got 85 bucks and a toooonnnn of clothes and shoes and accessories. This includes the fancy christmas sweater, jeans, and hair band im wearing today. I'm exhausted though from shopping and Christmasing. I'm in a really good mood and have positive energy today, because my mother fixed me breakfast for the first time in FOREVER! all in all, I'm happy and proud of my little sister for playing clarinet longer than i did. Congrats little sister :)

This isnt really about anything.

Nine o'clock in the morning, that's when I have to leave my house to go shopping tomorrow. Which mean's I'll have to wake up around 8 to get ready. Which also means a lost opportunity to sleep in.. but shopping is worth it for me. I really hate how my nana has to pay for it with checks though. That means we  have to be together and she tries to pick out weird stuff like grandmas do you know... But I never listen. The clothes and shoes are going on me, I don't wanna wear something I hate. Some people have a strange way of thinking. It's like they're unable to understand. Well all I know is that I have no clue where this is going, this blog. It's not making any sense to me and it's my own blog. Hah. I'm really tired because I've been watching way to many consecutive episodes of Glee. I'm almost done with season two which is really really sad for me because that's all they have on netflix... What will I do once I've finished them? I've never liked a show so much.. It's been a magical, inspirational experience. What can I buy for $200? That's my limit for tomorrow. It's really weird, going shopping for all my Christmas presents. I love knowing exactly what I'm getting so I don't have to worry. But my mother was like no. You have to be surprised a little. So tell me what you want vaguely and  I'll take it from there. I'm not too worried, more along the lines of wondering what brand or color of things. I'm really glad its friday. I've been looking forward to this weekend a lot. I'm tired of wearing the same clothes. I need to repaint my fingernails as well, I have ideas for how to decorate them :). I have a lot to look forward to! not just in the near future, but for the rest of my life. This is my favorite time of year, and I'm going to try to make the best of everything, even if I am a bit sad this month. I really need to go back to making posts about one thing and sticking to it. Cause I really dislike these long ones where i just type what im thinking. its weird and im sleepy. Nine o'clock!

I hate 2011

 Right now, I'm in this weird stage where I just could care less about school. I have been since the beginning of this year. It really doesn't matter that much to me this year. And I know it should and all, but it doesn't. I'm more concerned about my personal life. I think i'm really just going crazy because I might  be too concerned with my personal life. Do you know the feeling when so many bad things build up and you just wanna skip the rest that's probably yet to come and get to the good stuff? That's the boat i'm in. Now about 8 or 9 months ago I would've told you that I could never be happier with my life and the people in it. But a lot can happen in little time. I knew just what I wanted in life, it was planned a certain way and it was gonna happen, no matter how hard it'd be to get there. And in general I like to plan things out, a lot, and make lists and stuff.. So now, living a life without being sure of where your gonna go and when and how, is stressful to me. I hate that. But I'm realizing I made those plans for my life, the way I did, because I only had 9 months to plan my life, to get so much together in order for one little person to have a good life. And that little life doesn't exist anymore. So.. Now what do I plan? I'm just a little lost. And i realize this isn't a post that's really I don't even know the word.. it's kind of emotional but in my mind, it helps to write or talk about it. And I don't care if anyone reads this at all.. It's for my personal benefit. December and May are my least favorite months. I'm going to hate them forever probably. May is when my baby died, December is when it would've been born. Approximately 21 days from today. I have so much hate for things... I really regret coming back to public school this year. It's been an awful experience so far and if it weren't for money issues because homeschooling is freaking expensive, i wouldn't be here right now. There are plenty of reason's why I could've possibly not came back to school if things would've worked differently. I really wish I wasn't in such a doubtful, "why me?" situation. I skip from subject to subject a lot.. But I'm not quite like an teenager I know.. I don't care about being one. The experiences, adventures, high school, normal things.. They really don't matter. I'm not sure why either. I've always been a little ahead of myself in things like that. I was raised by people who were clearly unprepared to raise a girl, let alone two of us. I'd be amazed if I knew I dad that could play both mom and dad perfectly. My dad probably tried, but I never was exactly what he wanted or expected. So i guess i kinda rebelled a lot.. So all the fun I'm suppose to have now, I pretty much already did all I wanted to. It's kind of stupid. This chapter of my life just feels like a long drag of boring, waiting to get to where I've always wanted to be. 2011, you've been AWFUL!

I don't feel like dancin'

it's a good song that's on Sawyer ipod. You know what else is good? All the songs that Glee remakes. I can't help but love Glee. It's my favorite. I used to think it was really stupid before I really starting watching it. But it's not. It's not just singing.. Even though that makes up a large part of it, there's actually a story that goes along with it. I just love it and it's almost a bit inspiring. The other day I watched 10 straight hours of the show. I was up 'til near 6am. My favorite characters are Rachel and Finn. I just finished season 1 on Netflix and since they started dating, they BETTER stay together. If you watch it, and they don't make it, don't ruin it for me. I also really don't like Emma cause she looks like a squirrel, but she's better than all the other girls Will (the teacher) has strange relations with. His Ex wife was crazy.. I wish Puck and Quinn would have kept their baby.. Even though Puck's a butt-head to girls. And I feel bad for Artie cause that asian girl left him for the guy with working legs. Artie loved her! And as for Kurt, I know for a fact he finds love eventually cause people keep telling me he gets a boyfriend, so thats good! I think Santana's a meanie, she did you know what with Finn just to keep her reputation and make the EVIL Sue happy. Sue's a mean, mean lady. Maybe if she'd lighten up she'd find a man. Brittany is funny though cause she's really "not smart" the way she talks makes me laugh. Who am I missing? OH! Jessie's a *^%#^%$@%&%$&*#$^! I knew something was up from the beginning, but just as I started to trust him with Rachel, he left for spring break, came back and egged her! Oh well, all of these people make the show good, I know i'm forgetting some people but who's actually reading this anyway? Hah

I went shopping and am again..

So for my first weekend of shopping I changed my list almost completely.
I got a tapered curling iron with no clip, earmuff headphones, a new jacket, a shirt from aeropostale and its pretty and long sleeved, and a HUGE thing of makeup that is only part of what i'm getting. I'm excited. And this weekend I'm gonna shop all over again! I hate short posts...

It's 8:07 am

Today's blog is just gonna be about whatever. The next two weekends i'm going shopping to pick out presents for myself from other people. Mainly clothes, makeup, skin and hair tools. But yeah, I feel extremely sick today.. It's not a good day, full of surprises, and I don't fancy those too well. The only surprises I like are ones like surprise dates or surprise trips. This isn't going anywhere.. Thumbs down for tummy aches. So I posted this, and then decided to start it again. I didn't feel like making another blog but I wanted to type more, It's a distraction. So below is all the things i'm going shopping for. It's really just a list for me to look back on and write down later. So you don't have to read it, it has no importance to this blog.

American Eagle:
Two pairs of jeans
sweatshirt

Ulta
NYX natural nude on nude eyeshadow palette
3/4" Spiral curling iron
Triple barrel waver

Kohls
Some sort of handbag/purse (cross-body or wristlet)

Delia's
Mukluk Button Sweater Boots

Well if you read it, that's all I have so far that personally I am picking out for myself other than my skincare stuff!